Baby Zog consumed 1,478 calories yesterday. Most would wonder why I'm counting a two-year-old's calories or why this matters. The reason is because, in Zogland, 1,478 made yesterday an exceptionally good day.
You see, Baby Zog has developed an aversion to eating. Ten months ago it just meant he was becoming a picky eater. Six months ago it meant he wasn't gaining weight so the doctor suggested adding some high-calorie nutritional drinks to his daily intake to help him out. One month ago it became an active problem because he lost nearly 3 lbs over the holidays. Now, most of us would rejoice at seeing the scale slide down in the month of December, but for a growing two-year-old who was only in the 50th weight percentile, losing nearly 10% of that weight is something to discuss.
"So, he just doesn't eat at all?" This is what concerned friends often ask. This is also what the nutritionist our pediatrician referred us to asked. According to the nutritionist, it is pretty common for toddlers to be picky eaters. However, "picky" usually means the child will only eat a handful of foods - but they will eat LOTS OF those foods. The parents of these kids go crazy feeding them chicken fingers and mac n'cheese meal after meal, wishing they'd eat a green bean and wondering how to get vitamins into that pasta. But their kids continue to gain weight.
Baby Zog is a little different. Although he refuses to eat most "kid" foods like pasta, mashed potatoes, pizza, quesadillas, hot dogs, sandwiches, etc, he will eat a variety of foods. For the most part, he enjoys crunchy/grainy foods, fruit, dairy, and bacon. I mention bacon as its own category because it holds the distinction of being the only meat product he will eat. (We're thinking of letting him just go vegetarian.)
Food variety is not our challenge. Our challenge is delivered to us in two forms:
1. Baby Zog eats a variety of foods, but he eats very small amounts of those foods.
Not whole servings, but one slice of apple, 3 nibbles of a cookie, 2 chex, 1/2 french fry, etc.
2. On any day, Baby Zog will refuse to eat any food that he has previously enjoyed. This one is tough because it means we have to keep a giant variety available at all times and try to guess what's going to "hit the food jackpot" that day.
If you are wondering if we throw away pounds of uneaten or barely-nibbled-on food, the answer is yes. I try not to convert the wasted food into dollars in my mind.
The nutritionist visit was good and we'll return soon. She helped us devise a "plan." Here it is:
1. While we were previously throwing all our effort into getting 1,000 calories per day into the boy, for his age and height, he needs even more - around 1,300 per day. Try harder.
2. Most of the foods she usually suggests to bulk up calorie counts for kids are foods Baby Zog won't eat, so she told us to search for foods that are high calorie & high fat that we think he'll try. If those food have protein and fiber, all the better. So far our best new finds have been Organic Pop Tarts and Cheetos.
3. Stick with whole milk (she prefers organic) and stop cutting his juice with water. He needs the calories in 100% juice. This goes against everything we've been doing, but we'll return to low-sugar someday when he's gaining weight again.
4. Give him liquid nutrition drinks daily. (Of course, this gets tricky because he gets tired of them and then refuses them.)
5. Let him eat whenever he requests to - if that should happen.
6. Continue to give him daily vitamins.
In addition to offering reassurance and guidance, so also mentioned something that made both Daddy Zog and I relax a bit. She said if Baby Zog was actually "malnourished" he would stop growing taller. He is growing up like a weed - pants that fit a week ago are often too short today. So, we liked hearing that.
The unexpected side-effect of visiting a nutritionist was that we made it our mission to fatten the boy up. Our house is full of fattening foods and we work to the point of physical exhaustion trying to get Baby Zog to consume them. After a few days of charting progress (how do you calculate the calories in 3 bites of rice?) we realized that our extreme anxiety was affecting Baby Zog and he was eating less than ever. Tuesday, 603 calories. Wednesday, 756 calories. Ugh.
This brings me back to yesterday's 1,478 calories and why it's such a big deal. We decided to take a different approach for the weekend. Relaxation. We'll give Baby Zog the food and then back off. No bargaining with him. No comments like, "Baby, take another bite," "Baby, don't you want to eat this?" "Baby, show Grover how big boys drink their milk." No comments at all.
If there is anything I've learned in my 27 months of parenting it's that This Too Shall Pass. The issue we're tackling will soon be a memory. I want to chronicle our "calorie journey" because it will always be a part of Baby Zog's past. But mostly I want to be able to read back when this is behind us and we've moved on to a new challenge and say, "look, we conquered that one, we can do anything!"
Yesterday, the relaxation plan worked and my boy ate. Here's hoping today follows suit - it's 9 a.m. and we've reached about 200 calories so far. One day at a time...
